Some fruit and herb bhoga for Jagannath said my friend Geeta, as she stuffed a plastic carry bag into my black cloth bag emroidered with green parrots and inscribed with the word Radha.Thoroughly preoccupied by thoughts of how I can cook the next morning, I absent mindedly nodded my head in reply to her. It was 11PM by the time the program with HH Bhakti Charu Maharaj concluded on Friday evening. I had to be up at 3:30 AM the next day to get set and reach for Mangal Arotik at 5 AM. I had promised to make rava idlis and sambar for Maharaja's breakfast but did not have the time to go grocery shopping and hence, did not have the ingredients, especially the taste enhancing ingredient for sambar- Tomatoes. Sambar without tomatoes! I thought how am I going to make it. I had requested a devotee to bring two tomatoes for me at the Friday evening program and she promptly forgot. Devotees living close to the temple volunteered to go home and bring some for me. I stopped them looking at the time.Its too late to go shopping now and I have work for atleast 3 hours before I can hit the bed, I thought. For a split second, I looked at Radha Vrindavan Chandra and wished "Maybe Geeta mataji has put some tomatoes in there for Jagannath," but, it was time to leave and the thought got pushed out of my mind. I got home and got ready for the next service, making garlands for the sweet Radha Madan Mohan deities at whose home the Mangal arotik was..All of a sudden, on an impulse, I walked to my bag and pulled out the bhoga bag first. I opened it wanting to store it away properly for the deities.A first I pulled out a small ziploc with roses, another with some fresh oregano and rosemary, a grapefruit, a mango and something wrapped in paper.Wondering what could be so precious to be wrapped in paper, I opened it carefully.I could not believe my eyes when I saw two shiny ripe tomatoes staring at me from the bag..Just the right quantity that I needed, not more, not less. Once more Jagannath and Srimati Radharani had reciprocated, fulfilling my desire to serve. I ran to Jagannath who was beaming at me with a mischievous smile and thanked Him for being so kind to me..Later while narrating this to my friend Geeta, I was recounting other more serious instances in my life where Sri Radha Krishna have literally preserved what I have, and carried what I lack, and that I was not able to come to terms with their mercy starting from giving me these tomatoes, to not letting me down in other circumstances. As I paused speaking, she simply said " Digest the mercy." It is so hard to digest, knowing that I have no qualification to receive mercy.The sincere desire to serve Vaisnavas surely attracts this mercy. I recalled the verse from Srimad Bhagavatam on how one becomes the rightful inheritor of the Lord's mercy. (SB 10.14.8)
tat te 'nukampāḿ su-samīkṣamāṇo
bhuñjāna evātma-kṛtaḿ vipākam
hṛd-vāg-vapurbhir vidadhan namas te
jīveta yo mukti-pade sa dāya-bhāk
My dear Lord, one who earnestly waits for You to bestow Your causeless mercy upon him, all the while patiently suffering the reactions of his past misdeeds and offering You respectful obeisances with his heart, words and body, is surely eligible for liberation, for it has become his rightful claim.
I am still overwhelmed when I think of the Lord's mercy and still grapple with thoughts of how to digest the mercy when it comes. Cetainly the Lord's mercy is Ahaituki- causeless!
While on one hand this incident may seem as simple reciprocation, it instills faith, renews faith and provides practical realization that the Lord is personal to the extent that we are personal. The Lord is all merciful, we have to be open to receive it and digest it when it comes.
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