Free Rider.

Yesterday being Siva ratri, I was trying to follow HH Mahanidhi Swami's words by painting the canvas of my mind with pastimes of Lord Shiva. Hearing the pastimes of Aasheshwar Mahadev in Vrindavan,I was trying to tune into the message in it for me. Maharaj kept reiterating about how the devotee of the Lord, in this case Lord Siva, has hope against hope or 'Ashabandha.' Though considering himself unqualified, he still hoped to attain the lotus feet of Krishna upon his head and ultimately succeeded

Further; this morning On an impulse, I opened the pages of 'Vraja-Lila' (A 118 pages, Vrindavana lecture series book by HG Deena Bandhu Prabhu), and found this: "Bhuta means ghost. This is Lord Siva as the leader of ghosts. I don't know if you've ever seen a picture of Sivaratri, the night when Lord Siva got married". "Has anybody ever seen the bharat of Lord Siva? Bharat means wedding procession".

He goes on to mention how they visit a temple near Delhi in a place called Renukoot every year,where there is a beautiful Radha Krishna temple. Talking about one of the dioramas there, he says " On the side there are are many dioramas, and one of those dioramas is Lord Siva's wedding procession with the strangest personalities you would ever dream about. Think of your worst dream.Whatever monster you saw, it's even worse than that. The most obtuse, strangely shaped creatures are there, some with big long necks and all of the bones in their necks and ribs sticking out. Lord Siva takes care of these because he is very easily pleased. If Lord Siva is pleased with them, then they can get birth in a human body, so they are all his followers".
With prasadam in hand I was musing over the words in the following paragraphs and realized how much of a free rider I am; happily living off the beneficial actions of others. Lord Shiva, Gopiswara Mahadev is at home, worshipped every single day with Charanamrita from the salagram silas and is offered Their Mahaprasad, yet I make no effort to please him knowing that he is easily pleased! I just hastily put together the Bhoga offering, without even meditating on his position. Talking of prasadam, I just eat it up instead of honoring and savoring it as Maha-maha prasad. As for chanting the names of the Lord, the most pleasing activity to Lord Siva,mine is full of distractions and can be best described as abysmal!

Yes, I need to be mindful of my actions, my surroundings, my thoughts and my existence and stop being a free rider. Otherwise, even though in a human body it is just a ghostly, shadow existence that I am leading.

Gopiswara Mahadev and Maha maha Prasad.

As Chanakya Pandit states:

One indeed becomes blessed by having darshan of a devotee; for the devotee has the ability to purify immediately, whereas the sacred tirtha gives purity only after prolonged contact.

I can only repeat the prayers given by our Acharyas and beg for mercy from this greatest Vaisnava and hope to better my chanting.

vrindavana-vani-pate jaya soma-maule
sanaka-sanandana-sanatana-naradedya
gopishvara vraja-vilasi-yuganghri-padme
prema prayaccha nirupadhi namo namaste

“O Gatekeeper of Vrindavana! O Soma, All glories to you. O you whose head is decorated with the moon, and who is worshipable for the sages headed by Sanaka, Sanandana, Sanatana and Narada! O Gopishvara! Desiring that you bestow upon me love for the lotus feet of Radha Madhava who perform joyous pastimes in Vraja, I offer my obeisances unto you again and again.”